Film 119 in the "1001 Films to See Before You Die" challenge is 1934's "The Black Cat". This film is based on Edgar Allan Poe's story, only in concept. I really couldn't get into the film. Everyone looked scary. Bela Lugosi looked like a vampire and Boris Karloff, or as he's credited KARLOFF, looked like a cheap imitation of Frankenstein. I really couldn't care about the plot or why Karloff kept Bela's wife locked in a glass case. All I got out of the film was that Bela Lugosi has a fear of cats that are black and kills them as soon as he sees them. I spent more time looking at football results rather than trying to get interested in the film. It didn't help that because it's filmed in the 1930's that I really couldn't see anything. Nothing else left to say about this.... So.... If you have seen this film then let me know what you think of it in the comments. Here is what I had to say while watching 1934's "The Black Cat"
Film - The Black Cat
Year - 1934
Director - Edgar G. Ulmer
Written by - Peter Ruric
Staring - Boris Karloff, Bela Lugosi, David Manners
IMDb Rating - 7.2/10
My Rating - ZZZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
Length - 65 min
Genre - Horror, Crime, Adventure
So... Boris Karloff only went by KARLOFF back then
We open in a busy train station - Let's assume it's King's Cross or Clapham Junction
We'll leave you two alone in your own cabin on the train
"Who ever eats at a wedding?"
Bela Lugosi looks like a vampire
Great! We have to share our cabin with this stranger
That suitcase nearly fell on us!
6 minutes in and no cats have appeared on screen
How did it suddenly start raining
Hmm... they are asleep! Better stroke her hair!
Damn! I've been spotted! Better make up an excuse that I haven't been in a relationship in 18 years
So... Are we in Hungary?
Our bus has no windows or doors! We'll be protected from the rain with these sheets
Your story is so boring I fell asleep!
Did they just crash into a tree?
The driver is dead! The woman is wounded but the gents are alright
We'll keep her dry by covering her in a drench coat
Still no cats as we reach the 10 minute mark
So... everyone washed their hands in fish tanks?
What did he just inject her with?
KARLOFF is also a scary looking man
He also looks like the type of person who hates being interupted in the middle of the night
Just looked up football results! Manchester City are looking to Middlesbrough and Chelsea are level with Bradford City
Meanwhile, back to the film, Bela and KARLOFF have a chat about Bela's wife and daughter
Gimme a whiskey!!!!!
This film is making me sleepy
Now we see a cat on screen after 18 minutes and it's instantly killed by Bela who has a fear of cats
Nice to see the wife is awake
Why does she have a giant plaster on her chest?
We get a KISS ME BITCH but the camera blurred the shot! Bastard
We better escape! But first, lets get a good nights sleep
Let's blame the narcotics I injected her with for her weird behaviour
Don't mention the cat!
"The black cat is the living enbodyment of evil"
"The black cat is deathless" - That explains why it has nine lives?
Shall we swap rooms so you can be closer to your wife
Good thing each room has these sliding doors otherwise we wouldn't be having this conversation
Holy crap! Bradford are beating Chelsea!!!!!!!!!!!
Back to the film
KARLOFF has (I think) Bela's wife and daughter locked in glass cases
Oh and the black cat is back
It's 4:52am and KARLOFF gives the husband a wake-up call
Swerve! I'm in this room
KARLOFF is allowing Bela to see his wife and daughter
"Next time I'm going to Niagara Falls"
Who the heck was that guy?
I sense that this could be a trap
Here is where we use to keep all our guns! We now keep giant charts in here
By the way... Your wife is here as well
She's been dead for two years!
This is starting to drag!
And I'm gone
ZZZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
By the way - Bradford City have beaten Chelsea
Film - The Black Cat
Year - 1934
Director - Edgar G. Ulmer
Written by - Peter Ruric
Staring - Boris Karloff, Bela Lugosi, David Manners
IMDb Rating - 7.2/10
My Rating - ZZZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
Length - 65 min
Genre - Horror, Crime, Adventure
So... Boris Karloff only went by KARLOFF back then
We open in a busy train station - Let's assume it's King's Cross or Clapham Junction
We'll leave you two alone in your own cabin on the train
"Who ever eats at a wedding?"
Bela Lugosi looks like a vampire
Great! We have to share our cabin with this stranger
That suitcase nearly fell on us!
6 minutes in and no cats have appeared on screen
How did it suddenly start raining
Hmm... they are asleep! Better stroke her hair!
Damn! I've been spotted! Better make up an excuse that I haven't been in a relationship in 18 years
So... Are we in Hungary?
Our bus has no windows or doors! We'll be protected from the rain with these sheets
Your story is so boring I fell asleep!
Did they just crash into a tree?
The driver is dead! The woman is wounded but the gents are alright
We'll keep her dry by covering her in a drench coat
Still no cats as we reach the 10 minute mark
So... everyone washed their hands in fish tanks?
What did he just inject her with?
KARLOFF is also a scary looking man
He also looks like the type of person who hates being interupted in the middle of the night
Just looked up football results! Manchester City are looking to Middlesbrough and Chelsea are level with Bradford City
Meanwhile, back to the film, Bela and KARLOFF have a chat about Bela's wife and daughter
Gimme a whiskey!!!!!
This film is making me sleepy
Now we see a cat on screen after 18 minutes and it's instantly killed by Bela who has a fear of cats
Nice to see the wife is awake
Why does she have a giant plaster on her chest?
We get a KISS ME BITCH but the camera blurred the shot! Bastard
We better escape! But first, lets get a good nights sleep
Let's blame the narcotics I injected her with for her weird behaviour
Don't mention the cat!
"The black cat is the living enbodyment of evil"
"The black cat is deathless" - That explains why it has nine lives?
Shall we swap rooms so you can be closer to your wife
Good thing each room has these sliding doors otherwise we wouldn't be having this conversation
Holy crap! Bradford are beating Chelsea!!!!!!!!!!!
Back to the film
KARLOFF has (I think) Bela's wife and daughter locked in glass cases
Oh and the black cat is back
It's 4:52am and KARLOFF gives the husband a wake-up call
Swerve! I'm in this room
KARLOFF is allowing Bela to see his wife and daughter
"Next time I'm going to Niagara Falls"
Who the heck was that guy?
I sense that this could be a trap
Here is where we use to keep all our guns! We now keep giant charts in here
By the way... Your wife is here as well
She's been dead for two years!
This is starting to drag!
And I'm gone
ZZZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
By the way - Bradford City have beaten Chelsea