Film - The Wizard of Oz
Year - 1939
Director - Victor Fleming
Staring - Judy Garland, Frank Morgan, Ray Bolger
IMDb Rating - 8.1/10
My Rating - 8.25/10
Who put the sepia filter on?
Reading
Run Dorothy Run!
You can easily tell these were filmed on a movie set
Don't talk to me, I need to count my chicks
Hunk just smashed his finger with a hammer
That's not the smartest place to walk
Just as I type that, Dorothy falls into a pig sty
"Their gonna erect a statue of me" - No they won't
Miss Gulch sounds like a meanie
Is Toto Dorothy's counsiler/guidence?
"SOMEWHERE OVER THE RAINBOW"
Dorothy's singing voice is meant to be young but sounds like a old woman
Also... You can tell she's mouthing the song!
IT'S MISS GULCH!!!
Miss Gulch is mad because Toto bit her
Destroy Toto!!! That's a bit harsh
That dog will be safe in my wicker basket
Aunt can't say "Bitch" because she's a Christian?!?
Toto escapes the basket and returns to Dorothy
Dorothy proposes on running away and then leaves... walking like nothing bad is happening
Dorothy bumps into a Professor Marvel
Is Professor Marvel a mind reader?
Toto just stole Marvel's sausage!!!
Stare into my ball.... it's crystal!
Mark Anthony? Wasn't he married to Jennnifer Lopez?
How can he see that? All I see is Marvel's tie in the reflection
Marvel says Aunt is having a heart attack
Boy it just got windy
TWISTER!!!!
Nice to see a tumbleweed in the wind
Everyone excluding Dorothy hides in the storm shelter
Dorothy holds her head even though that window looks like it never hit her
FLYING COW!!!
IT'S THE BITCH!!
SHE'S A WITCH!!!
You spin me right round, baby, right round like a record playing
And that's the end of the ride
Thanks cameraman for fixing the sepia to colour
Is this the same set from Willy Wonka and The Chocolate Factory (just altered slightly)
"I have a feeling we're not in Kansas anymore"
Is that a bubble or a J J Abrams lens flare?
Neither! It's the magical fairy
Someone's just dropped a house on the Wicked Witch
"Only bad witches are ugly"
MUNCHKINS!!!!
I wonder if Munchkins actually know where Kansas is?
Is this a song, how does everyone know their parts? It's as if this was pre-meditated
DING-DONG! The Witch is dead!!! - [insert Margaret Thatcher joke]
The coroner "throughly examined her" - Basically, he went up to her corpse and was like "Yep! She's dead"
Does The Mayor have flowers on his shoes?
Ballerinas are in charge of The Lullaby League?!?
"The Lollipop Guild"?!?!
They are clearly singing out of the side of their mouths
IT'S THE REAL WITCH!!!!
The slippers have disappeared... on Dorothy's feet!
I so want to see a bitch fight!
"I'll get you my pretty, and your little dog too!"
Glinda tells Dorothy to visit Oz in Emerald City
"Follow The Yellow Brick Road" - But I wanna follow the red one!!!
Three munchkins told the same message to Dorothy in the space of a second!
Bye Dorothy! Don't walk into that painted background!
IT'S SCARECROW
Scarecrow doesn't have a brain... but can talk perfectly fine
Don't you just hate having a nail in your back?
Scarecrow is a shit scarecrow
Is it a requirement for everyone to sing their problems?
Dorothy agrees to take Scarecrow with her to visit Oz and both sing "The Wizard of Oz" song
How did Dorothy and Scarecrow not see The Witch?
Those trees can talk!!!
Why is this tree have a voice of an mobster?
The trees won't give them apples but throw them at them
IT'S TIN MAN
How can you tell Tin Man is saying "Oil Can"?
Tin Man has no heart... So how is he alive?
Time to sing about Tin Man's troubles
Did they just make a Shakespeare reference of Romeo & Juliet?
So that's where Michael Jackson got his lean dance from for Smooth Criminal
Dorothy says Tin Man can join the journey
It' the witch on a rooftop
FIREBALL!!!!
Is it me or Tin Man looks a little like Boy George?
I'm gonna hate "The Wizard of Oz" song by the end of this film
In the jungle, the mighty jungle, a lion sleeps tonight
"Lions and Tigers and Bears! Oh My!"
IT'S A LION!!!
Dorothy defeated Lion with a slap
Time to add Lion to this gang of misfits
Time for a song about Lion's problems
At The Witch's lair
The Witch pours poppies everywhere to make them sleep
That walk to Emerald City didn't take long
The poppies are putting everyone to sleep
Glinda makes it snow and that wakes everyone up but Tin Man turns rusted again
A gentle bit of snow can rust Tin Man?!?
There's snow in that shot but no snow in the next
Time for The Witch to strike
"Bell out of order, please knock!" - The bell works, they just tried it
So... Much... Green
THE HORSE IS PURPLE!!!
More singing
Now it's red!
Now yellow!
Nothing like a good pampering
Is there a reason why Tin Man still has his axe?
The Witch has found them and decides to write messages in the sky rather than attack
Time for Lion to sing about being King of the Forest
Lion is clearly mouthing the song
Where did that grass robe come from?
Courage puts "Ape" in Apricot?!?
Oz's servant tells them to "go away"
Dorothy starts crying because of this
Is he crying out of his eyebrows?
Lion just dropped a load in fear
IT'S OZ - Not played by James Franco
Do people still say "Jimmy Crickets"?
Oz tells all them about what not to do
Lion faints
Whippersnapper?
Oz says he'll help them if they bring The Witch's broomstick
Lion reawakens and dives out of the window in fear
Scarecrow somehow has a gun!
Tin Man now has a wrench as well as his axe!
The Lion has a thing!
Tin Man is then elevated and dropped out of the sky
Here comes The Witch's monkey butlers
The Monkeys take Dorothy & Toto and fly back to The Witch
Scarecrow, Lion & Tin Man plan a rescue mission
I'll trade the dog for the slippers
The slippers won't come off because Dorothy is alive
Toto escapes and runs away
The hourglass is counting down!!!
How did Auntie Em get in The Witch's crystal ball?
Toto finds the others as they stuff Scarecrow back together
They climb up to The Witch's lair
Oo-Ee-Oo
Better get a move on, that hourglass is ticking down
Three guards find them and get beaten up
Like the guards will fall for that
They did!!!
FOLLOW THE DOG!
Now the axe comes into play and it breaks the door down
Time to escape
The Witch stops them just before they leave
Scarecrow knocks down a chandelier and they flee
They're trapped!!!
FIRE!!!
SCARECROWS ON FIRE!!!
Dorothy throws water on Scarecrow and The Witch gets a bit
"I'M MELTING!!!"
The Witch melts and dies
The guards become Dorothy's friends and give them the broomstick
They're back to meet Oz
"You liquidated her" - That makes it sound like The Witch went out of business
Toto finds the real Oz behind a curtain
Scarecrow just called Oz a "humbug" - So Scarecrow is suggesting Oz hates Christmas?
Oz tells everyone that they've had everything they've wanted after all
Scarecrow is given a Diploma of Th.D
Lion is given the Triple Cross Medal
Tin Man is given a Testimonial and a heart with a clock inside it
Dorothy is told she can go back to Kansas via a hot air balloon
Oz gives Scarecrow, Tin Man and Lion all the power is Oz doesn't come back
Oz flies off without Dorothy who got out to get Toto who tried attacking a cat
IT'S GLINDA!!!
Glinda tells Dorothy she's always had the power to return to Kansas
All Dorothy has to do is click her heels together
Time for one last goodbye
Why does Dorothy say she'll miss Scarecrow the most? Did Dorothy and Scarecrow have a thing going on?
"There's no place like home"
Back in Kansas with the sepia filter turned back on
Wait... that was all a dream???
THE END